What started as my own morbid curiosity has now lead to this list of people who died on the toilet. I apologize for nothing.
I was going to hang onto this list and share it on the anniversary of Elvis Presley‘s death, but I thought that would be in poor taste. Oh, who am I kidding? I’m 100% going to bring this list back on the anniversary of The King going off to glory. So if you end up reading this in mid-August: yes, I know it’s in poor taste. And once again, I apologize for nothing.
I blame Depths of Wikipedia. Not directly, mind you. I didn’t find this list through them, but the Wikipedia-related arcana that the Twitter feed shares got me thinking about weird stuff on the internet. Props to Annie Rauwerda who runs Depths of Wiki and has shared with the world the fact that there’s an active volcano called Stromboli and a town called Dildo, but I don’t think she’s shared the poop list. Yet.
Here’s a List of People Who Died on the Toilet
To paraphrase reggae legend Cutty Ranks, there are six million ways to die. But to die on the toilet is a particularly undignified way to go. Granted, some toilet-diers got what was coming to them. Tywin Lannister from Game of Thrones, for instance. “And what? You’ll kill your own father in the privy?” Actually, yes. Tyrion will. And did. Classic.
This list isn’t fiction, though. It’s fact. There are modern-day toilet deaths, there are historical toilet deaths. And my list is just an abridged version of Wikipedia’s master list. Look, if anything, you’ll have some new, interesting knowledge to impress your friends or maybe score you a few extra points at your local bar’s trivia night. Just don’t forget to flush.