Taking a different approach to this week’s 12-Inch Poll. But still keeping it festive with Christmas songs people love that I just don’t.

My initial idea was to make a big, long list of “The Worst Holiday Songs,” or something of that nature. But that’s the tricky thing about the music of the holiday season: there might be a song that puts you in the mood or brings back fond memories of holidays past that someone else might hear and want to jump out a window. One person’s Christmas trash is another’s Christmas treasure, etc.

 

So I decided to take a different angle. I decided to make a short playlist of just six songs. These are all very popular songs that are heard around the holiday season. They’re played on the radio, pumped over sound systems in malls, and even used in holiday advertisements. There’s even one that’s spawned a global game centered around avoiding the song for as long as you can.

 

6 Christmas Songs People Love That I Hate

OK, now that I think about it, maybe “hate” is too strong a word. I dislike these songs. For me, they do not spark holiday joy; they do not put me in the Christmas spirit. But I’ll tolerate them, depending on the context. That context is usually: “I’m with my kids, and they like this song, so I’ll just let it play.”

 

Perhaps you’ll be in my camp regarding these, perhaps you will not. I respect your decision. But, in the spirit of the 12-Inch Poll (and the holiday season), I’d like you to choose the one you like the least. You can scroll through the short list and cast your vote below. Then, to cleanse your palate, you can peruse my punk rock Christmas playlist. Happy Ho Ho Ho-lidays!

  • Lou Monte "Dominick The Donkey"

    “Oh, but it’s cute! It’s for the kids!” No, it’s not. It’s trash. And if you never played it for them, they’d never ask for it.

  • Madonna "Santa Baby"

    I’ll indulge in the Eartha Kitt version, because that woman is a legend. The Madonna version is borderline parody. And it wasn’t meant to be, which makes it worse.

  • Mariah Carey "All I Want For Christmas Is You"

    Enough. Enough with the fake “tradition,” enough with the memes. Retire this one already.

  • NewSong "The Christmas Shoes"

    Look, I’m all for a “sad” Christmas song when the mood calls for it. But this isn’t “sad.” This is clinical depression.

  • Paul McCartney "Wonderful Christmastime"

    Shit song. Absolute garbage. Not even wacky-ass Mac DeMarco can redeem it.

  • Wham! "Last Christmas"

    Obviously I’m not trying to mess with anyone’s Whamageddon streak, so here’s the Jimmy Eat World version to stand in.

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